Sunday, August 17, 2008

Top Ten--Things I Wish

I wish...

10. ...Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi all the happiness in the world. They seem very good together. While I'm somewhat offended by the notion that it should take two lovely, high-profile celebs to convince this country that everyone is entitled to marriage rights and (by extension) love and happiness, the sentiment remains. A toast to them and to love, in all of its fetching, beautiful complexities.

9. ...That John McCain would stop pandering to Conservative Christians. "I will chase Osama bin Laden to the gates of Hell if I have to in order to bring him to justice." People who say that he's different than George W. Bush may be right. But when it comes to simple, reductive language like this, that positions righteous and evil extremes and is designed to impress and appease simpletons, they are two of the same.

8...That black people would be more wary of Barack Obama. Yes, he looks like you. But before everything else, the man is still a politician. A politician who managed to win the nomination of a major political party for President of the United States. Thus, he should be approached (at best) with cautious optimism.

7. ...That black people would be more wary of John McCain. It's not a done deal. McCain can still win. Obama doesn't have a double-digit lead. In order for McCain to lose, Obama needs to win every state that Kerry and Gore won, plus a few others. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's not a done deal. McCain may still win. Stop acting like we've made it to the mountaintop.

6...That black people would be more wary in general. And of the right things...

5. ...That Tyler Perry would come out of the closet. The man's films have camp value of epic proportions. I'm not a fan, but if he were honest with himself, he could totally redefine his fanbase, becoming a sort of black John Waters. Wouldn't that be (at the very least) fun to watch?

4. ...That Eddie Murphy would stay in the closet. Forever. Gay people already have crazy Tom Cruise and crazy/disgusting Larry Craig forever tarnishing the good name. Why have another lunatic bringing down the cause?

3. ...That there were more interesting black filmmakers. Spike Lee's great, but he's pretty much all we have to look up to. It's really disheartening trying to break into an industry where it seems like the road isn't paved for you simply because of the color of your skin.

2. ...That Jane Campion would make a comeback. I believe she's got another masterpiece in her. The Piano was so beautiful and we need more great women directors

1. ...That people were more considerate of others in general.